Behavior Guide
Christianity is principally a love relationship with the living God out of which flows a lifestyle that is
pleasing to Him.
One of the dangers of the Christian life is to allow your relationship with God to focus on outward behavior without love for God as the motivation. Our focus of Christian growth and maturity is a deeper and more mature love for God. Once that is accomplished, right behavior will follow.
As a result, the behavior guide at West Cannon encourages and enhances the development of a student’s relationship with God. We do have rules, and we expect them to be followed but they are not our focus. A relationship with Christ is the correct focus. Obeying the rules should be only an expression of a student’s love for God.
One of the greatest disservices our ministry can offer is to promise students, parents, and church members that the Student Ministries will be free of sin. An attempt to fulfill such an unrealistic expectation, would require a legalistic, rigid approach to behavior where unacceptable behavior is thought to be curtailed by an excessively detailed code of conduct. There are several serious problems with this approach:
Finally, all of you be of one mind, having compassion for one another; love as brothers, be tenderhearted, be courteous.
1 Peter 3:8
pleasing to Him.
One of the dangers of the Christian life is to allow your relationship with God to focus on outward behavior without love for God as the motivation. Our focus of Christian growth and maturity is a deeper and more mature love for God. Once that is accomplished, right behavior will follow.
As a result, the behavior guide at West Cannon encourages and enhances the development of a student’s relationship with God. We do have rules, and we expect them to be followed but they are not our focus. A relationship with Christ is the correct focus. Obeying the rules should be only an expression of a student’s love for God.
One of the greatest disservices our ministry can offer is to promise students, parents, and church members that the Student Ministries will be free of sin. An attempt to fulfill such an unrealistic expectation, would require a legalistic, rigid approach to behavior where unacceptable behavior is thought to be curtailed by an excessively detailed code of conduct. There are several serious problems with this approach:
- It doesn’t work.
- It has the wrong goal.
- It creates an unhealthy dependency upon a system of rules.
- It promotes a passive, potentially offensive attitude toward others sins.
- It reduces the Student Ministry staff to the role of an enforcement agency.
Finally, all of you be of one mind, having compassion for one another; love as brothers, be tenderhearted, be courteous.
1 Peter 3:8
Develop godly relationships with others
Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. Romans 12:10
1. Treat everyone with respect
Show proper respect to everyone: Love the brotherhood of believers, fear God, honor the King. 1 Peter 2:17
2. To encourage positive interaction among students and leaders, we ask that electronic
devices not be brought to student ministry programs or activities.
3. Live out the Matthew 18 principle
A. When you know another student has sinned, go to them and lovingly
confront them about their sin (v. 15)
B. If they do not repent and stop doing that sin, then take 1 or 2 other students with you and lovingly confront them again
about their sin (v. 16)
C. If they still will not repent and stop doing that sin, then tell their parents
and/or an adult leader (v. 17)
If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your brother. But if he will not hear, take with you one or two more, that 'by the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established.' And if he refuses to hear them, tell it to the church. But if he refuses to hear the church, let him be to you like a heathen and a tax collector. Assuredly, I say to you, whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven. Matthew 18:15–18
Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. Romans 12:10
1. Treat everyone with respect
Show proper respect to everyone: Love the brotherhood of believers, fear God, honor the King. 1 Peter 2:17
2. To encourage positive interaction among students and leaders, we ask that electronic
devices not be brought to student ministry programs or activities.
3. Live out the Matthew 18 principle
A. When you know another student has sinned, go to them and lovingly
confront them about their sin (v. 15)
B. If they do not repent and stop doing that sin, then take 1 or 2 other students with you and lovingly confront them again
about their sin (v. 16)
C. If they still will not repent and stop doing that sin, then tell their parents
and/or an adult leader (v. 17)
If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your brother. But if he will not hear, take with you one or two more, that 'by the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established.' And if he refuses to hear them, tell it to the church. But if he refuses to hear the church, let him be to you like a heathen and a tax collector. Assuredly, I say to you, whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven. Matthew 18:15–18
Obey your leaders
Obey those who rule over you, and be submissive, for they watch out for your souls, as those who must give account. Let them do so with joy and not grief, for that would be unprofitable for you. Hebrews 13:17
In cases of disobedience, adult leaders will take the following steps:
1. The leader will talk to the student and lovingly
and clearly communicate what attitude or action
is unacceptable and why. They will ask the
student to work at changing their behavior.
2. If the behavior continues and the occasion of the behavior is disruptive to the group, the
student may be asked to leave. The student’s parents will be approached to discuss how to help the student with their behavior.
3. Further misbehavior will result in the student being denied the privilege of attending and
participating in our programs until a plan of action is agreed upon by the parents, the
student, and the Pastor of Student Ministries.
Pursue purity and avoid youthful lusts
Flee also youthful lusts; but pursue righteousness, faith, love, peace with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart.
2 Timothy 2:22
1. Wear modest clothing
A. All believers should wear modest clothing, but girls are given special instruction in
the Bible. How girls dress can be a great help or hindrance to purity in the body
of Christ.
In like manner also, that the women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with propriety and moderation. Not with
braided hair or gold or pearls or costly clothing, but, which is proper for women professing godliness, with good works.
1 Timothy 2:9–10
B.Modesty is defined in Scripture as dressing in a way that does not draw attention to one’s fashions, styles, or body, but
rather to one’s godliness and who one is as a person in Christ.
C. Not everyone will agree on modesty standards; there will be differences of opinion between individuals and families. We do
not have a dress code, but instead, ask each person to consider— Does my clothing reflect modesty and a commitment
to promote the good of the wholegroup?
D. For swimming, we ask that girls wear one-piece swimsuits or tankini swimsuits that cover the entire midsection.
2. No public displays of affection (PDA) and separate sleeping quarters for guys and girls at overnight activities
That each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable...
1 Thessalonians 4:4
Flee also youthful lusts; but pursue righteousness, faith, love, peace with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart.
2 Timothy 2:22
1. Wear modest clothing
A. All believers should wear modest clothing, but girls are given special instruction in
the Bible. How girls dress can be a great help or hindrance to purity in the body
of Christ.
In like manner also, that the women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with propriety and moderation. Not with
braided hair or gold or pearls or costly clothing, but, which is proper for women professing godliness, with good works.
1 Timothy 2:9–10
B.Modesty is defined in Scripture as dressing in a way that does not draw attention to one’s fashions, styles, or body, but
rather to one’s godliness and who one is as a person in Christ.
C. Not everyone will agree on modesty standards; there will be differences of opinion between individuals and families. We do
not have a dress code, but instead, ask each person to consider— Does my clothing reflect modesty and a commitment
to promote the good of the wholegroup?
D. For swimming, we ask that girls wear one-piece swimsuits or tankini swimsuits that cover the entire midsection.
2. No public displays of affection (PDA) and separate sleeping quarters for guys and girls at overnight activities
That each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable...
1 Thessalonians 4:4